One day, I was waiting for my friend to go shopping so I decided to walk around and wait for her at a clothing store. Then my stomach suddenly didn't feel good and I really had to use the bathroom. I really couldn't hold it and I was near unattended fitting rooms... so went into one and took a dump on the fitting room seat. I rushed out after taking care of...uh... business. I went on the rest of the day as if nothing happened.
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My sons had a pet bunny that we were going to get rid of because it pooped all over the apartment but me and my husband decided to cook it instead. we told our kids we sold it.
I was walking with my boyfriend I've been with for 4 years, he told me he had something really important to say and to not get too emotional. when he reached into his pocket I thought he was going to propose so I yelled out:"YES!! OF COURSE!!" Turns out he was just going to hand me some tickets he got when he was driving my car and that we should see other people, later that day I saw him with another girl and he proposed to her.
My Boss asked me to clean his teenage son's laptop one day. When I went through his files I found a couple video clips of fully naked guys doing... things. I never had the heart to tell my boss that his son could be pitching for the other team.
so... i have this obsession with my acne. I use a needle to pick the stuff out of my blackheads... and then i eat it D:
A few months back I didnt think much about consequences. I was riding shotgun in my friends truck and thought It would be funny to throw a plastic cup out the window. After I did I heard tires screech and a crash and I panicked. My friend didnt want to stop the car and now I cant get that night outta my head.
Watched a girl get slapped hard in the face by some small Italian dude. They were walking together and arguing. Then all of a sudden I look back for a quick second and I see the slap that shut her up. I really wanted to do something, but I learned not to rub my nose into people's business.
I was walking around st marks one saturday night. In the distance I saw some cute lady in a dress squatting down near some building. As I got closer I started to check out her legs (Im a guy, sue me). I didn't think about why she was squatting until after I passed by her. I noticed she looked embarrassed and she was sorta squirming while crouched. I never found out what exactly happened. She either drank too much and was peeing in the street or she had diarrhea. It might have been the runs since she didn't look drunk. That would also explain all the wiggling and squirming.
I am 55 years old and I have never been given a birthday cake. I am easily forgotten by people... On my last birthday my husband of 36 years did not remember that it was my birthday til late that night.......
My brother's arse hairs are so long that he literally braids it... He says his goal in life is to be a centaur.